Is it impossible to just sit and be quiet? I've bribed my three mini-monsters with quiet toys, munchies and hard cold cash to stay silent for the hour long mass they must attend each sunday.
"Mom...church is sooooo boring...!"
"Yes I know. But we are going and together we'll be bored."
As an adult, my husband and I really like church. I need to go to refocus calm in my life. I do know in time my kids will see the benefit. But for now, all they know is, if they aren't quiet this ugly crumpled mean-looking face will snap and hush them with a snappy two-word sentence:
Others tell me my kids aren't that bad. But I see the other kids. Other kids don't kick sibblings, fart really loud and then annouce they did just that, or lauch themselves from one pew to the next yelling, "Whoooahhh!"
Nope. Just my kids. Anyone behind us gets some well-needed comic relief. First from my kids and then from big-nasty-fun-stopper me.
Truth is, I really want to laugh. My kids are hilarious. But if I did, I know those free entertainment watchers would switch gears and suddenly judge the other way: "What a horrible mother....thinking it's funny her kids behave that way! She can't dicipline them all at! How rude!"
Can't wait till next Sunday.